Renting – Need advice and help please (uk please)?

Spread the love

A question by Becky :  

My ex-boyfriend ran up arrears for august and September as a result my landlord evicted him, now she is constantly harassing me, phoning, texting and letting herself in, she and her husband came over to the house on Wednesday and was using foul language and threatening behavior towards me all over this rent arrears, ive spoken 2 my ex-boyfriend and he said she has never made contact with her in order to discuss repayments over the rent arrears so basically she has dumped it straight on me, ive paid her around 1100 which covers oct and November rent and yet it’s not good enough and her and husband demanded i find somewhere else to live and get out now.

she won’t prove the rent arrears by showing her bank statements only writing letters stating an amount, ive been seeking advice from c.a.b and housing advice and she keeps higgling the arrears, I’m single mum of two and cannot afford to pay her the arrears and she and her husband are making my life a living hell, i cannot take the swearing or threatening behavior let alone it being done in front of my children, she believes she is allowed to enter the property.

because of the arrears and now im being made homeless the council will not help me so i really do not know what to do and if i involve the police im scared they will get worse.

she refuses to write my notice stating i have to get out! i signed a new lease at the start of November 2022 and the harassment continues, ive changed my mobile number and now she is sending horrible letters through the door, all the stress and harassment she is given me has resulted in me having mega chest pains and now i have to have weekly heart scans.

p.s i am willing to pay the arrears off but she wants it up front and i dont have that type of money as I’m not working and even with a repayment in plan, she will continue to harass me.

she keeps threatening to take me to court and put the house up for sell, this has been dragging on for months and it’s just threat after threat.

do i even stand a chance with the council helping me find somewhere else to live, i dont have anyone to turn to or can help me out in housing me or my kids, I’m really worried that I’m going to lose my children because of her making me homeless.

Update : I have worked since the age of 16 and got laid off when pregnant with my second child! i have NEVER been on benefits before and although im now a single parent, i am still not claiming benefits.


Provide a response using the comment section. After review we will update the answers.

“Okay, lets see if we can help – ignore the nasty comments :-)

First thing to do is to clarify if you even owe the arrears. Was the previous tenancy agreement in your name, your Ex’s name or both? If it was only in your ex’s name then you have no liability for his debts.

Assuming the tenancy was you & your boyfriend, you are responsible for the debt BUT the debt from this tenancy cannot be used to evict you from the sole tenancy that you signed in Nov 2022. When you pay rent, do so with a letter which mentions the cheque number and clearly states it is rent for whatever month – and keep a copy of the letter. This will prevent LL from putting the rent against your old debt.

You signed a new agreement in Nov, presumably for 6 or 12 months – landlord cannot evict you until the end of the fixed term UNLESS you have rent arrears on this tenancy – it has to be at least 2 months’ worth unpaid before they can serve you with a section 8 (g8) notice – which is only the start of the process.

IF landlord or husband try to remove you before the end of your fixed term without getting a court order then it will almost certainly be illegal eviction. Call the police immediately as this is a criminal offence and can result in a prison sentence. Info here:

If the harassment continues, this is again a police matter. Don’t worry about any reprisals – as I said above, they can only kick you out in specific circumstances.

LL may take you to court for the unpaid rent from your old agreement and if she provides proof then she would win – but if you include details of your repayment proposals in your reply to the court it will almost certainly be accepted and so become official. There would probably not be a court hearing.

LL is not allowed into your home, even if you are behind on your rent. It’s fixed in common law and is called ‘quiet enjoyment’. Essentially it means that while you have a tenancy then you can (within reason) treat the house as if it were your own – and that includes the right to not have people in who you don’t want. IF the tenancy agreement says that the LL is allowed in if they give 24/48 hours’ notice, this can only be enforced with a court order. Keep a record of any unauthorized entry by your LL as it also constitutes harassment.

Excessive harassment can constitute illegal eviction, but getting a police force to make that link is easier in some areas than others.

If the LL sells the house, then your tenancy goes with it – you just get a new landlord. Having a tenant CAN reduce the value of a house by as much as 20% and for this reason, some LLs are willing to pay their tenants to leave before due time. It is unlikely your LL would do this – but if you’re both desperate for you to leave the house then there might be a chance.

DO NOT leave the house before the end of your fixed term or you get a court order. If you do you will be liable for the rent until the end of your fixed term.

Finally, if you do get evicted, the judge will make an order giving you at least 14 days to sort yourself out. After those 14 days, your landlord CAN NOT throw you out! That too would be illegal eviction. The landlord will have to get the court bailiffs to eject you. They will contact you and tell you when they are coming – it usually takes about a month.

Now so far as benefits are concerned – you are entitled to some benefits so claim them. At the very least more money coming in will make it easier to pay off any money that you do owe – which has got to help the situation – hasn’t it? Reading your other posts, I gather you have 2 kids? If you are out of work, the very least you will get is Housing Benefit for a 2-bed house. The amount varies from area to area but will be around £120 pw or your rent amount + £15 (whichever is lower). The +15 ends April 2023.

In this situation, with kids, the council will re-home you but as non-payment of rent is considered ‘self-inflicted’ then you will be given the most basic accommodation – b&b for example with all 3 in 1 room.”

Masked landlord, I am a UK private landlord

“Okay Becky, firstly, although I am pleased to hear that you have worked since you were 16 and are not a “dole dosser”, I have to say: Claim the benefits entitled to you now! Pride is nice but won’t keep a roof over your children’s heads. Then get a job as soon as you are able of course; o)

Oh, and no-one can foretell their future and I would assume that when you and your ex had children, you obviously weren’t expecting life to turn out this way so ignore the other “keep your legs shut” posters.

Your children will not be taken from you if you are made homeless because the council will not let you become truly homeless in the first place. What they provide probably won’t be nice or cosy but it will be just about enough. They have a legal obligation to house you as far as I know (I have never lived in council properties but I do know a thing or two about a council’s obligations) but they cannot put you in emergency housing until the day the emergency occurs (i.e eviction day)

And listen to what Masked landlord has said. He’s got it spot on.”

  • “Are you on the lease as well as your ex-partner?
  • If you are then you are responsible for any rent arrears if you are not on the lease then you shouldn’t be in the house if your ex-partner has been evicted.
  • If you are not working etc etc then your rent is provided by the local authority so why are you in arrears? I presume because you CHOSE not to pay your rent.
  • If you owe the landlord money you need to pay it.
  • If you are evicted for nonpayment of rent the local authority will say you have made yourself homeless and do not have any obligation to house you apart from possibly bed and breakfast accommodation.

You are only seeing this from your side of the fence (which is natural) but you need to realize that landlords have obligations too and by not paying your rent, especially when you are handed tax payers money to do so, you are in the wrong. Your view of ‘threat after threat’ is in the landlord’s view ‘trying to get owed money or the property back’.

I hope if nothing else you learn a lesson from this. The roof over your head is your number one priority – not having a mobile phone or affording a new sim to change your number etc – it is paying your rent and keeping your children safe and secure.

I also would second the previous people who say don’t have kids you can’t afford to keep. Then again that is closing the stable door etc etc….”


  • “1) Find somewhere to live – letting agents, local newspaper, Rightmove etc. Google ‘flats to rent your town’. This will be difficult because tenants on benefits with no rental history are a risky proposition for landlords. Once you find a place, it is likely to take at least 2 weeks for references to be checked and paperwork to be completed.
  • 2) Once you have agreed to rent a place, apply to the local council for housing benefit. You will get enough for a cheap 1-bed flat if you apply together, or a cheap room in a shared house if he applies alone. Housing benefit is paid 2 or 4 weeks behind; rent is usually due 1 month in advance, it is up to you to sort out the difference. If the council haven’t sorted out your housing benefit within 14 days of you providing them with all the info they provide, you can ask for an ‘advance’ (loan) until they do sort it out.”


“I was kinda in the same situation you are. I had a hard time knowing the person i wanted to be with didn’t want to be with me. I waited for a yr and now we are finally together.

If i where you i would just leave her alone. Maybe contact her a couple days a week just to see how she’s doing i mean 3 years you have to care about her and i know you miss talking to her. Let her see what you really meant to her. If she misses you, she WILL find a way to contact you, and in doing that it will show you how much she really cares by calling you just to see why you have called her as much.

Being a girl myself as long as you chase her the more, she is going to run. She told you she didn’t know what she wanted. so, in other words, she needs time, so give her what she wants give her that space she asked for. Show her you care by giving her that. If it is meant to be she will come back to you. Everything happens for a reason. I know all this is hard to do but it does work it worked in my situation. Im glad i did all this. Besides doing all this will show you if it IS meant to be or not. Good luck and i hope everything work out the way you want it to, and if not then i wish you the best of luck starting something new

David Lin, Professeur

“The court is always the best protection. Most states protect the tenant. I am a landlord. File with the local Housing Court, they will send you a date to appear, then bring all of your receipts of payments, and the landlord will do the same. Bring any facts with you to court as to taped answering machine messages or any paperwork that supports your case. Emotions have no baring in court either, just facts and as much as possible. The court is who can tell you to move out not the landlord and in some states during winter you will not be made to move. Good Luck !”

Massachusetts experience

“You are in a serious situation here. Go to the CAB in the morning (back to them?), take any paperwork you have regarding your rental with you. They should be able to help you, especially as you have children, although to be honest, you may be looking at B & B from the Council, depending on where in the country you are as Local Council accommodation is very scarce. I can’t believe the Local Council ‘won’t help you’ if you have children however. Normally they chuck housing at you when you have children.

I’m afraid I do have to agree with the comment about going ahead and having children, no settled partner etc.. I have no children, because I never felt we were in a situation to afford them!!!!!!!!!!!!!”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *





  1. The USD swiftly declined post the inflation report, but when observing gold in Euro or British Pounds, it hasn’t reached…

  2. Perhaps there’s an update: the possibility of a surge beyond 2000, but encountering resistance around the 2080 mark.

© 2023. Made with Twentig.